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aesop rock - sick friend

one of my best friends who I hadn’t heard from in a long time IMed me last night, it was one of the greatest conversations I’ve ever had.  the reason for this is this friend had become an opiate addict over the past four years and slowly became detached from everyone he knew.  all of us witnessed his slow decline into addiction, helpless to stop the slippery slope from painkillers to methadone to tar heroine.  he was evicted from his home, having to move back in with his parents.  he sold his car and laptop.  he lost his girlfriend.  he lost his job.  he was living the addict lifestyle; one fix at a time and nothing else mattered.

he IMed me to let me know he had been clean for 6 days, he was going to meetings, and he had a sponsor.  he told me he would never go back to using again and that was the best news I had heard in a long time. 

we talked an hour about all sorts of things, for all intents and purposes I hadn’t seen him in a year so there was a lot to talk about.  he told me just how bad it got, about the shame and the needles, stuff that required a lot of courage to be honest about.  we talked about how it all started and the damage that had been done.  he told me about the detox and the physical torment that he lived with the past few days; how he nearly relapsed on his 2nd day in from the cravings.  he has admitted to the world that he is an addict and committed himself to the lifelong challenge of sobriety. 

i asked him what the tipping point was; what made him take stock of his life and say no more.  he said that was tired of not making anything of himself.  he said that he had lost contact with everyone he cared about.  he told me that he loved us all too much and he knew that if he kept using he would eventually die from it.  i know he was right, i feared greatly that one day I would get that phone call and it would have been devastating.

we ended our conversation talking about the future; how we can hang out again and how much easier life will be without chemical dependency.  I also told him that none of the stuff that happened during his addiction mattered anymore, that he was always welcome in our circle of friends and that we all loved him very much.  I can’t tell you how great it is to have him back and know that he’ll be around for many years to come.